Saturday, February 7, 2009

What She Wants

In my world, when it comes to relations between the sexes, the female is the aggressor. Men send signals of availability, and women make the choice of whether they are interested in them or not. Sometimes, women make unwelcome advances, and it is impossible for men, being so much weaker physically, to resist them. Furthermore, the legal and economic framework in my world doesn't make it easy for men to refuse. Men have few legal rights even in relatively progressive cultures here. To press a case, they require a female representative, usually a family member or a wife, in court to represent them, and cases of rape and harassment are civil, not criminal, matters. Furthermore, the court testimony of a male requires the backing of a female.

In other respects, the economic situation of most unmarried men is also quite unstable, and the prospect of having a regular female lover who may provide some financial support, even if she already has husbands, can be quite hard to turn down. For men in my world, choices are sometimes very easy to make, but very hard to live with.

Incidentally, the usage of language in my world is not exactly the same as in yours. Words that exist in your English may have a completely different significance in mine. One such word, in this context, is mistress. In my world, it can be used to describe the usually already-married woman in an extra-marital relationship with a single male, usually much younger than she is. Many words exist in my world to signify the male in such a relationship, many of them diminutive and condescending, such as boy, toyboy, hobby horse and side dish.

In the future, whenever appropriate, I will write more about how languages differ between my world and yours.

Update: Made some small modifications to the text, but not the image. Feb 8, 2009


  1. Excellent. Though you've mentioned before that males don't always have it easy on your world, this entry really brings home that point. I think it's up to interpretation whether the one in this picture is enjoying himself or is protesting, leading the woman to say, "Shut up, or I'll wring that scrawny little toyboy neck of yours with one hand."

  2. Hi! Thank you. I guess everyone brings their own interpretation to everything they see and that's the point. :)

    For me, the scenario as I see it is that the young man is conflicted; part of him wants to respond to her, and yet another part of him knows that he shouldn't. Usually, in your world, one would say that his heart wants to yet his head says he shouldn't, but this is never that clear cut in mine. His head and heart simultaneously say yes and no. Logically, he would want to respond in hopes that the affair would lead to him being set up in a more comfortable financial situation, and perhaps he is also physically very attracted to her. Perhaps she is his boss, someone who has direct authority over him, and men in my world are very attracted to powerful women. On the other hand, logic would also dictate that in the end, the affair will not last forever. Also, perhaps his heart longs for a situation where he might be courted for marriage, a situation that would not occur if it was common knowledge that he was another woman's boy. Either way though, the choice has already been made for him, and most men in my world know it is useless and dangerous to resist.

  3. I enjoyed reading the background story for the image, and while the men in *my* world have it a bit easier than in *yours*, resistance is generally futile.

    This collage is also part of my collection, so I get to point out that your pants are seriously on fire, as you did edit out the necklace and earring that matched the ring, but maybe you did that a long time ago. I like either version, although perhaps less jewelry makes it a bit less distracting to the eye. I don't know.
    In either case my eye flies to that thumb on his lips, and the expression on her face that seems to declare possession and inalienable control.

    The color scheme quite adds to the drama of the scene. Me like!

  4. My pants are seriously on fire because:

    a. I like humming U2's Desire?
    b. I left them for too long in the dryer?
    c. I once sang in a performance of Handel's Messiah?
    d. The economic downturn we are facing is quite dire?
    e. None of the above.

  5. f. All of the above. :D

    And that's a great new blog image header you got there!

  6. Correct! 10 points to my esteemed collager colleague Undersquid.