Sunday, August 18, 2013

At the Movies: Bond, Jane Bond

Summer action blockbusters are as popular in my world as in yours. The most obvious differences, of course, are that in my world, the vast majority of protagonists in this genre of film are women, from films featuring tough cops to suave international spies, taciturn cowgirls to fast-talking heist planners, almost every single heroine or villain in these movies are female. In such movies, men play very minor roles as objects of sexual interest, or perhaps ones to be put in peril and distress – a family member kidnapped against his will, as an example – and thus providing the motivation for our movie heroines. Only recently have male characters been written to have a larger role in such films, but again only in such 'soft' roles such as conspiring to seduce and sleep with with an enemy character to steal an important secret. Invariably, these male characters will often be put in peril in the course of the movie in order for him to be rescued, or even killed to provide a motivation for vengeance.

All of this is natural in my world. A full-grown man can barely lift a small handgun, much less fire one without being severely injured, and even a man well-trained in martial arts – and some men are permitted to pursue such sport – can barely hold his own against a young girl, even untrained, much less a full-grown woman. Such are the differences in physical strength and coordination between the sexes. A male action hero would be a risible thing here, indeed.

As is also natural in my world, women may and often do take many lovers, and our larger-than-life heroines on the silver screen take much more than most.  Scenes of our protagonists bedding a string of willing (or heretofore unknowing that they are willing) boys in between car chases and explosions are par for the course.

None more so than Bond, Jane Bond, of course. One of the longest running series of spy action films in my world, featuring the suave titular character, who is just as vicious and cold with her male sexual conquests as she is in dispatching her female villainous counterparts and their various henchwomen. Even in most other action films, the heroines do display some heart, perhaps finally falling for one of her many male mates at films' end, a little throwaway to those male romantics in the audience, perhaps. But not our Jane, oh no, just as likely to leave a recent former lover to his untimely fate without a second thought as she is to provide him with a passionate farewell kiss.

A combination, no doubt, that secretly thrills even the most forward-thinking of men in my world, and renders her absolutely irresistible to all men, fictional or otherwise.